Not as bad as I thought...

I have been feeling pretty pathetic. For one thing, I did NOT eat well this weekend.  Indian food, cookies, candy, wine, beer, I mean, give me a break!!! What is my problem? And I totally felt like shit afterwards.  Had to get up early this morning to do a little spot on the news for work, and was totally foggy.  Ug. Going to get back on track with a vengeance.
 I didn't get to go to class on Friday morning last week, because my stepdaughter puked all over our hotel room, and I just couldn't sleep after that.  Figures.
 I fell on my head again trying to do a handstand yesterday.  Why, Oh Why???!!! I have done it successfully several times!  I can hold it for 40 seconds!  It is just that my stupid brain cannot seem to coordinate the transition when it happens quickly.
Maybe I have fallen on my head too many times.
Yesterday I totally sucked at double unders.  At one point, I was like...screw it!  I have been putting in so much work and I am getting worse, not better.  Screw it.
 However.....I am not as bad as I thought.
Tonight in class, I got my first complete Rx.  Hell yeah!
To get that Rx, you have to do the WOD as prescribed- no scaled modifications. (Less weight, pushups on knees, etc.)
First we had to find our 5rm for hang squat cleans.  I got to 85# and decided I had had enough.  Maybe I could have done more, but these are new for me.  A couple of weeks ago I almost went down doing full squat cleans!  Seriously, had I not caught myself, that barbell and I would have crashed backwards through the freezers! Typical. hah
So then we had a 10 minute amrap of: 5 hang squat cleans (Rx for women was 65#), 10 pushups, 15 double unders.
I totally had a breakthrough with the double unders and got into a good rhythm of single, double, single, double etc.  Felt like I was going to die, though, Holy Crap!  So I only got five rounds total, but I got the Rx, baby!  Form, weight, speed, then the ability to combine all three.  That's where I want to be.
It doesn't matter if I place in the challenge or not.  Through my efforts I am becoming a stronger athlete, and that, at the end of the day, is really the point. Still striving to become that better version of myself.

Snatch It, Baby!

Much to my consternation, no WOD was posted online before I went to class at 6:30 this morning.  I like knowing what to expect, or in some cases, fear!  This morning we had to find our 2RM hang power snatch, then do an 8 minute amrap of 5 burpee box jumps and 7 hang power snatches.  Rx for women was 55#.  No way in hell.  I had never done these before, but luckily, due to my own inner geekiness, I was watching videos on YouTube on how to do a full snatch.  I actually practiced it with a wooden stick. If I hadn't, I would probably have been totally confused, to say the least! It is a complex move.
I started out with the 15 # training bar, because I really wanted to feel it out.  I wound up having a 2RM of 55#, and MAYBE could have done more, but I still want to focus more on form and safety at this point with a move like that.  For the amrap, I used 45#, and fell one rep short of 6 rounds!  I was happy enough with that for now.  Again, today was another example of overcoming that fear of lack of skill and ability.  Granted, I am by no means perfectly executing this movement, but it is a step in the right direction! Yay!

Home Stuff

This week we are having to get out of our house for two days or so, due to part of our remodeling project.  Our house used to belong to my husband's grandmother, and it got to the point where she really couldn't take care of it anymore, so we took ownership of it, and she now still lives there with us.  It has been a LONG road in that respect!  Firstly, everything about the house screamed 70'S HELL!  Secondly, she was/is totally a hoarder.  You would not believe the stuff that was piled up in that house! But that is another story entirely.  In a nutshell, we eventually convinced her to let us pack up her stuff and keep it in a storage facility while we remodel the entire house.  We are nearing the end of that process, thankfully, but this week we will have to stay in a hotel for two days while they complete the toxic process of reglazing all of the bathroom tile.  Goodbye pink and brown!  BWWAAAHAHAHAHA!  But needless to say, having no kitchen to use has made the whole Paleo thing a bit more challenging, and being in a hotel is going to impede my ability to practice double unders. 
Last night at Iron Tribe, the WOD was as follows:
200 air squats
100 situps
100 kettlebell swings
100 pushups
Good news was that you could attack it however you wanted to.  Rx was 35# bell for women, but I just didn't feel ready to take that on yet.  I really want to master the 26, and really get my body, especially my back stability right on target.  I broke it up into 10 sets of 20 squats and 10 of everything else, and finished in 18:36, which was ok.  Afterwards, one of the coaches said, "Why didn't you go for the Rx, it was easy for you!"  I said I just wanted to be careful, since I had never even used kettlebells before starting Crossfit.   But he's right, the 26# IS getting much easier for me to use.  Honestly, though, I have a hard time imagining swinging a 35# ball of iron above my head with ferocity at this point. 
That's the great thing about Crossfit, though.  You have a hard time imagining yourself doing all sorts of things in the box.  And then you do them.  It's all about breaking those boundaries, and when you do that, you really start building a type of confidence that spills over into other areas of life.
There were a bunch of new guys in there last night straight out of 101, that were pointed out to us at the beginning of class. When class was over, one of the coaches told us to introduce ourselves to the new people.  "Don't be jerks, guys."  My problem is that I am still relatively new and didn't know ANY of the guys in there to begin with, nor did I remember who was new and who wasn't! I introduced myself to one guy, but he had been at ITF longer than I have.  Feeling stupid now.  Not going to make any more introductions! So I guess I was being a jerk.

It's more than just exercise

Throughout my life I have had difficulties.  I have battled eating disorders.  I battle depression.  I came to a determination years ago, that I would not live my life dependent upon some psychoacitive drug.  No fucking way.  So I manage my problems through lifestyle decisions.  And it is not always easy.  I still have my  peaks and valleys, but if I have something to strive for, something that motivates me, then I feel like I can make it. 
I watched my grandmother on my father's side of my family struggle with bi-polar mental illness.  The medications did not make her into a stable person.  She eventually committed suicide when I was 17.  I was the only relative in the state, and I was called to deal with her first failed attempt, and eventually the successful one.  I have decided that I will not end up like that. 
Before I joined Iron Tribe, I was stuck in a rut in many ways.  I was losing my motivation, which was then in turn, having a detrimental effect on my total well-being.  So I am grateful to have sometheing new to focus on. 
When people first meet me, a lot of the time, I don't leave a favorable impression.  It's not that I don't want to, but I come across as standoffish, or stuck up in some way.  And I'm not.  I am nothing like that.  I am insecure, I doubt myself and my abilities, and I have a hard time judging most days what I look like, or what I can do, or how I am coming across to people.  But for the people who can get past that stuff, they find that it is hard to find a more understanding, empathetic, or forgiving person than me.  I genuinely enjoy seeing other people accomplish things and be successful.  It thrills me to no end to see other people discover the best within themselves and to strive for more. But I have a level of perception about other people that is both a blessing and a curse.  I can sense what other people think. How they feel about things.  Things that are said, done, or just how they feel about people in general.
Today was a bad day.
Martinis from the night before did not agree with my state of mind.  All day I felt depressed.  I was going to try to run this morning, but I just didn't feel like it.  I was just feeling down on myself because I feel like I cannot make the kind of progress I want to make. I am still wary of the handstand, althought my husband spotted me while I kicked up and held it three times, so I feel a LITTLE better about that.
I was in Dick's sporting goods tonight, and had a long conversation about Crossfit with a random guy who worked there.  Clearly I need to make some friends who also do this. 

Former Vegetarian Finding the Inner Caveman

I have been doing Crossfit for approximately 12ish weeks now? A few weeks into it, I began to make the Paleo diet modifications.  To eat Paleo aka caveman, you only need to eat meat, veggies (no potatoes or corn), fruit, nuts and seeds.  Nix the grains, sugar, dairy. I am somewhat good with this.  I eat lots of different salads, eggs, veggie/egg souffles, veggie soup, kale chips, nuts, pastrami turkey, etc.  I am always looking for something new in this area.  I do not eat 100% Paleo.  I eat soy sauce, and probably get certain sugars or dairy stuff from sauces or dressings, and I use stevia as a sweetener.  The thing I like about the Paleo philosophy is that it is not some kind of diet fad thing that is not maintainable in the long term.  You are not re-programming your body to use something unnatural as a source of energy, and it emphasizes total long term health.  I am lucky in the respect that I was essentially raised by vegetarian hippies, and any fast food, chocolate, caffeinated thing was like a four letter word in our household.  So this whole Paleo thing might be a little easier for me than some...however, I am trying to branch out in the "meat" direction.
When my husband and I got married, it was an unlikely match.
Meat Barbecue Man meets Veggie Girl....
I began eating chicken and seafood, and admittedly, I am a total food snob now.  Only the freshest fish from Whole Foods, and only organic chicken from the same place.  If I do delve into beef, it must be organic, and grass-fed.  Period.
A typical day's diet for me would be as follows:
Pre-workout at 5:45- Amazing green meal replacement, coffee, and chia seeds
Post-workout at 7:15- a protein shake
At work- an apple and a handful of raw almonds
Lunch-veggie souffle, turkey, green beans
Mid-afternoon- split pea soup, turkey, kale chips or almonds
Later on- Bananna Lara Bar
Dinner- Chinese takeout- Mongolian chicken, Mixed vegetables
Really, I feel like I can go pretty much anywhere and eat mostly Paleo-  Mexican= chicken fajitas, veggies, guacamole, sour cream, salsa.....  Indian= Hot tandoori fish, a veggie dish.... Chick-fil-A- nuggets and a salad.... see, it can be done for the most part.

Now, my #1 weakness is wine and such.  Presently, I am having a diry martini.  Even when I drink and cheat, I still try to eat well, ex- Japanese- grilled shrimp and salmon with mixed veggies.
I will lie and pretend that I didn't eat about 20 girl scout cookies last weekend.
Before I joine Iron Tribe, it was not uncommon for me to have a drink or two most days of the week.
Now, I MIGHT drink a little on Wednesday nights, but reserve most it for the weekend. And I am trying to cut down  on the weekend amounts.
I know this change has had an effect on my appearance.  Thank goodness, or I would just keep doing it! :)
But really, total health is a big part of it all, vanity aside!
I am so happy to be getting stronger as well.  In the WODs, these are my priorities: Proper form/technique/safety, RX weight, speed.  So looking forward to when I can easily combine all three elements!

Hell Yeah!

So for the past few weeks, I have been going to Iron Tribe on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, where I do the WOD.  Then on Tuesdays and Thursdays, I practice wall climbing into a good handstand hold, do L-sit progressions, and sometimes do double unders.  I usually do more of those on Sunday.  Then on Saturdays, I have been doing the AMRAP WOD (gone from 5 to 6.5 rounds with a barbell that is 10# heavier!), along with pullups, and some hip rehab work, and then on Wednesdays nights I teach Body Pump at the Alabaster Y, then head over to the Shades Valley Y to train deadlifts, pullups, and more hip rehab stuff. Yeah, I've been pretty busy. I think I need to rest more!
I have fallen on my head twice now, trying to kick up into the handstand hold, probably because I just am not focusing on locking my arms. Dumb.  Now I am even more scared to do it! But I know I am strong enough!
I have bruised the hell out of my shins with a barbell a few times a week now, so my legs look like crap, and I have repeatedly bruised my knuckles with my speed rope when I mess up the double unders.
Oh- did I mention, bruised collarbone from power cleans as well?
My husband does not like this.
Before it is over with I will look like a UFC competitor.

I'd finally begun to really gain some ground with unassisted overhand grip deadhang pullups, but of course, now my left forearm is injured.  Muscle strain or something.  It's no wonder....
Clearly I need to chill out. So I'm just gonna take a step class and run this weekend.

So here's where the Big Hell Yeah comes from-  This morning in class we had to do a partner WOD where you take turns doing 5 handstand pushups, 10 deadlifts, and 15 med ball cleans. As many rounds as possible in 20 minutes. Every five minutes, one of the coaches would blow a whistle, and you and your partner have to stop and do 30 burpees.  Jeez. Rx for deadlilfts was 125#, med ball was 14#.  And....I did it!! Still had to have my feet in the windowsill for the HSPU, but I am definitely making progress!  I am just happy to be improving.  At this point I would rather be slower and go for the Rx, rather than blow through the WOD quickly.  Wouldn't it be great to be able to do both.....

The Beginning of the Challenge

I happened to have Jan. 16th off of work, and I'm thinking, "Man, it sucks that I have to be at the gym (according to my online class schedule) at 6:00 a.m. for this initial testing." I went out to dinner and to a movie with a friend the night before, and did not get enough sleep at all.  So I walk into Iron Tribe all bleary-eyed, and notice something odd.  The 5:45 class is in progress, and no one else is there. Damn. Please don't tell me I came here this early on my day off for no reason. So I ask one of our coaches about it, and he's like, "Oh, yeah, you just do the testing in any class today throughout the day."  He's kind of laughing, and tells me I can just do the 6:30 class. 
Great.  I am obviously the only person in the whole constest who didn't know this. Typical.
So I do 6:30, and my results were as follows:
5 rounds in the AMRAP WOD with a 55# barbell (Yeah, whimpy, I know...)
20 pullups with the black rubber band (Lame. But at the time, I wasn't sure WHAT I should use....)
20 double unders ? I think? That seems like a lot, since I am so bad at them.
165 # max deadlift
NO handstand hold. Zero. Have no idea what I'm doing. Not strong enough to wall climb into valid position either.  (I am terrified of stunts of any kind, and have been dropped on my head in the past.)
1.7 seconds for the L-sit (It is so damned hard it is almost impossible!)
1:27 400 meter run (I am ok with this.)

Now that Iron Tribe has an official record of my lameness, I set out to make a training plan that will mold me into a LESS lame athlete over the next six weeks.  I am an AFAA certified personal trainer, but I do not train anyone. Why not?  Because I am selfish about my own limited workout time, and up to this point, the certification course has just served to feed my own geeky obsession with exercise science. So here is what I came up with.....